{"product_id":"executive-director-of-loud-sleeping","title":"Executive Director of Loud Sleeping","description":"\u003ch1 data-start=\"45\" data-end=\"114\"\u003e💤 \u003cstrong data-start=\"50\" data-end=\"114\"\u003eExecutive Director of Loud Sleeping \u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"116\" data-end=\"119\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"121\" data-end=\"147\"\u003e📄 Product Description:\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"149\" data-end=\"307\"\u003eHe wasn’t watching that show. He wasn’t tired.\u003cbr data-start=\"195\" data-end=\"198\"\u003eThen he passed out mid-sentence with the remote still in hand — and started snoring like a small leaf blower.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"309\" data-end=\"582\"\u003e🎓 Introducing the \u003cstrong data-start=\"328\" data-end=\"379\"\u003eExecutive Director of Loud Sleeping Certificate\u003c\/strong\u003e, proudly awarded by the \u003cem data-start=\"404\" data-end=\"444\"\u003eSnorwick Institute of Couch-Based Rest\u003c\/em\u003e, in honor of unmatched snoring volume, blanket hogging, and the mysterious ability to fall asleep during movies he swore he was enjoying.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"584\" data-end=\"587\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"589\" data-end=\"628\"\u003e🧠 Why This Makes the Perfect Gift:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"629\" data-end=\"876\"\u003e✔️ Personalized with your favorite napper’s name\u003cbr data-start=\"677\" data-end=\"680\"\u003e✔️ A hilariously accurate tribute to legendary couch-sleeping sessions\u003cbr data-start=\"750\" data-end=\"753\"\u003e✔️ Perfect for living rooms, man caves, or anywhere his “power naps” happen\u003cbr data-start=\"828\" data-end=\"831\"\u003e✔️ A gift that says “we hear you” — literally\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"878\" data-end=\"881\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"883\" data-end=\"916\"\u003e💬 Just a Taste of the Glory:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"917\" data-end=\"1008\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"917\" data-end=\"946\"\u003e\"I'm just resting my eyes.\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"946\" data-end=\"949\"\u003e– Certified Loud Sleeper, 4 seconds before full hibernation\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1010\" data-end=\"1013\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1015\" data-end=\"1031\"\u003e✅ Great For:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1034\" data-end=\"1048\"\u003eFather’s Day\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1051\" data-end=\"1071\"\u003eBirthday Gag Gifts\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1074\" data-end=\"1116\"\u003eHusbands, uncles, brothers, or coworkers\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1119\" data-end=\"1155\"\u003eAnyone who snores louder than the TV\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1157\" data-end=\"1160\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1162\" data-end=\"1183\"\u003e📐 Product Specs:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1184\" data-end=\"1393\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1184\" data-end=\"1193\"\u003eSize:\u003c\/strong\u003e 8\" x 10\"\u003cbr data-start=\"1202\" data-end=\"1205\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1205\" data-end=\"1215\"\u003ePaper:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium enhanced matte (nap-approved)\u003cbr data-start=\"1253\" data-end=\"1256\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1292\" data-end=\"1306\"\u003eThickness:\u003c\/strong\u003e 10.3 mil\u003cbr data-start=\"1315\" data-end=\"1318\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1318\" data-end=\"1329\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 189 g\/m²\u003cbr data-start=\"1338\" data-end=\"1341\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1341\" data-end=\"1356\"\u003eBrightness:\u003c\/strong\u003e 104% (unlike his eyes after 9:15 PM)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1395\" data-end=\"1398\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1400\" data-end=\"1432\"\u003e🙌 All About the Experience:\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1435\" data-end=\"1473\"\u003eCustom name personalization included\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1476\" data-end=\"1523\"\u003ePrinted on demand and shipped with cozy vibes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1526\" data-end=\"1615\"\u003eGuaranteed to get laughs (and maybe guilt-trip someone into letting you finish the movie)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1617\" data-end=\"1620\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1622\" data-end=\"1866\"\u003e🚨 \u003cem data-start=\"1625\" data-end=\"1769\"\u003eDisclaimer: This certificate does not reduce snoring volume, prevent remote control naps, or stop the recipient from denying they were asleep.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1868\" data-end=\"1949\"\u003e🧾 \u003cstrong data-start=\"1871\" data-end=\"1949\"\u003eThis is a custom product, lovingly made just for you. All sales are final.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Prank Certificates","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41651226345575,"sku":"9331763_4463","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0592\/7783\/6391\/files\/Loud_Sleeping_-Framed.png?v=1756912792","url":"https:\/\/20zbfh-g6.myshopify.com\/products\/executive-director-of-loud-sleeping","provider":"Prank Certificates","version":"1.0","type":"link"}